Written by: Erika Fletcher, MACP (Candidate), Counsellor at Peak Resilience
Book a session with me | erikafletchercounselling@gmail.com
Gambling Is More Than a Personal Problem – It’s a Family Issue
When we think about problem gambling, the focus is usually on the person placing the bets, but what about their loved ones? What happens when gambling becomes a central force in family life, shaping decisions, relationships, and mental health?
Research shows that for every one person struggling with problem gambling, up to 17 others can be negatively impacted (Marionneau et al., 2023). Family members, especially spouses and children, often experience the same (or even more severe) emotional, financial, and psychological harm as the person gambling (Jeffrey et al., 2019; Riley et al., 2021).
The Hidden Toll on Families and Intimate Relationships
The reality is, gambling addiction doesn’t just take money, it takes up space in relationships. According to Adams (2010), the addictive behavior can become the central axis of a person’s life, with everything else, including their family, rotating around it. That imbalance often leads to:
Eroded trust
Chronic stress or anxiety
Emotional withdrawal
Breakdown in communication
Reduced intimacy
Children Are Not Immune
Children growing up in households affected by gambling are at high risk; not just emotionally, but developmentally. Many experience unpredictability, emotional neglect, and even shame, often without fully understanding what’s happening (Valentine & Hughes, 2010; Riley et al., 2021). Sadly, silence is a common strategy families use to cope, but research shows that children do notice, and they often wish someone would talk about it (Tedgård et al., 2019).
In therapy, breaking that silence can be a powerful first step toward healing, for both parents
and kids.
You Deserve Support Too
Family members often step into the role of “unofficial therapist,” managing the chaos while putting their own needs aside. You may feel like you can’t ask for help, or like help doesn’t exist for you.
But you don’t have to go through this alone. Counselling gives you a confidential, non-judgmental space to explore:
How this is affecting you, not just the person gambling
Boundaries and how to set them without guilt
Rebuilding trust and communication
Your own mental health and identity
The 5-Step Method, a counselling approach grounded in family systems and stress-coping theory, has shown promising results in helping family members reduce stress and build resilience, even months after treatment ends (van Beek et al., 2023).
The Power of Social Support
Social support has a measurable impact on recovery; not just for the gambler, but for you. One study found that higher levels of support were linked with fewer gambling-related problems and greater emotional well-being at long-term follow-ups (Petry & Weiss, 2009).
Whether it’s peer support, professional therapy, or a trusted community, the more supported you feel, the better you can cope – and heal.
Let’s Talk
If your partner, parent, or loved one is struggling with gambling and it’s affecting your life, I’m here to help. As a practicum counsellor at Peak Resilience, I offer compassionate, reduced-cost counselling to individuals navigating the stress, grief, and complexity of addiction in families.
Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, confused, or just stuck, I’d be honoured to support you.
Click here to book a session with me
Or reach out by email: erikafletchercounselling@gmail.com
You deserve to be supported too.
References:
Marionneau, V., Järvinen-Tassopoulos, J., & Pirskanen, H. (2023). Intimacy, relationality and interdependencies: Relationships in families dealing with gambling harms during COVID-19. Families, Relationships and Societies, 14(2), 194–214. https://doi.org/10.1332/20467435Y2023D000000003
Petry, N. M., & Weiss, L. (2009). Social support is associated with gambling treatment outcomes in pathological gamblers. The American Journal on Addictions, 18(5), 402–408. https://doi.org/10.3109/10550490903077861
van Beek, M., Velleman, R., de Bruijn, T., Velleman, G., & Goudriaan, A. E. (2023). Helping family members affected by a relative’s substance use or gambling: An evaluation study of the 5-Step Method delivered in the Netherlands. Drugs: Education, Prevention and Policy, 31(3), 318–327. https://doi.org/10.1080/09687637.2023.2165040
